Up and down

Well, yesterday went very well. I was quite exhausted by the end of the day but my head handled it pretty well. This morning, however, was another story. My head hurt quite a bit today. I guess I am paying today for the busy day yesterday. After really taking it easy for several hours today I picked up a bit but hopefully tomorrow will be better. These headaches really are puzzling. How can I seem to tolerate things fairly well yesterday but wake up the next day miserable. Strange--it would seem more likely that it would happen right away.

I had a quiet day at home most of the day. Tanner went to Grandpa's to do some work in his shop. The next two went swimming at the pool for the afternoon and Tara played with her cousins at their house. We went to Renae's for supper, but it was good to have quite a bit of quiet time today. It sometimes becomes discouraging to continue with these headaches even though they aren't nearly as bad as they were. I would love to be done with it! I pray that the Lord continues to give me and my family the grace to deal with it each day.

Better

Well, I've had some tougher days but I am feeling better again. I am so thankful! It has been a busy time with the things I need to go to, getting the kids to various activities and lessons, etc. I was careful today because tomorrow we are having a small 8th grade graduation for Tanner and my niece. Just immediate family but that still totals 32 people! It is at our house, but we are doing easy things and my sister made several things, etc. So I am being careful and hoping that tomorrow goes ok.

I am so thankful that I can be a part of all these activities, though. Last year at this time I was in a lot of pain. I wouldn't have been able to do all this if it had been last year. Providential that the difficult time was times well. Of course, all things are providential but I am thankful that the Lord has allowed me to be here in better shape. I pray that next year at this time I am ok as well because it will then be Kylie's graduation. She is already talking about her party next year--I hope I can do it!

Thursday

Wow, what a week! We started the week (or ended last week) with Tanner's birthday on Sunday. The kids had a concert Monday night. Kyle had a church meeting Tuesday night. Tanner's 8th grade graduation was Wednesday evening, then we have a graduation tonight, graduation party tomorrow night, birthday party Saturday evening and a little graduation party for Tanner and cousin on Sunday at noon. Way too much activity for this old lady! I am really feeling it and not feeling so well right now. I did lay down a couple hours this afternoon but my head is still hurting a little more than I like. I am staying home tonight and I am trying to take it slow but it isn't so easy with so much going on. A fair portion of my problem is just the physical aspect and unfortunately I mentally just don't handle things so well yet. I get overwhelmed much too easily. I know I am getting older but I if I was it better shape I could handle this better than what I am.

Tanner

Could it be? My oldest son is 15! Where does the time go? How do they grow in that time from an infant in my arms to a young man that I have to look up to? What a blessing he has been to us!

Friday

I haven't been feeling quite as well this week. Again I'm not sure why. It isn't bad but the headache is just a little more strong and bothersome. Oh, well. As long it doesn't get a lot worse I am ok.

It has been a while since I have given an update on the little things. My ears continue to ring--I think that will probably always be the case. I have had them not ring for a few days after each shunt placement or revision but then they start up again. So I know it can quit but just doesn't seem to want to. My right ear has been a little more painful again, too. It sometimes feels a little like an ear infection but I am sure it is just another symptom. The rash on my back is improving although I still get spots here and there. The eating is going much better. It seems that the only thing that I have be careful of is beef and to a certain extent pork. I ate a half of a hamburger last night, though, and it went pretty well. Progress!

The noise still bothers me quite a bit, particularly if there is a lot of activity occurring at the same time. Busy places just aren't so great for me. I will really be in trouble if one of my children decide to play basketball or volleyball! I think my balance is improving although when I get tired or overwhelmed I do feel a little unbalanced sometimes.

The sun is shining today and my small lilac tree is blooming beautifully right now. Spring is so wonderful! It is my favorite time of the year. I love seeing things coming to life after a long winter. God created this world with so much beauty!

contentment

Contentment is a difficult thing to achieve. I am so happy that I am doing as well as I am but how easy it is to complain about the things that just aren't as good. Why is it so easy to focus 0n the negative?

The sky is blue and the sun is shining after a long stretch of cold, windy and rainy weather. It is delightful to feel the sun shining on my face. I had the opportunity to watch my kids march in the parade today, which was so fun! But then I get a little frustrated that I have to plug my ears as the bands go by and that I am sitting in a wheelchair because I can't walk as far as necessary to get to the parade route. It is the normal, every day things that I didn't think about at all "before" that I sometimes miss the most. And I have to admit that it is a little embarrassing to ride in the wheelchair. I am always noticed. People wonder why I am in a wheelchair when I obviously can walk. But I guess that is my pride getting in the way. It is what it is, and despite all the tough things, I really have been blessed. The Lord has given me more time on this earth to enjoy watching my kids with my husband. So I will focus on the positive and put my frustrations aside.

Sabbath

Another Lord's day has come and is nearly gone. It has been a good week overall, although a bit exhausting. What a blessing to be back in our church to worship. It was a little quieter with all the college students gone again for the summer

We had a surprise birthday party for my mom, who turned 60 this last week What a surprise it was to her!

The busyness has made my headache a little bit stronger again. I slept for a few hours this afternoon and hopefully a good night sleep tonight will help. Oh, to live for even a day without a headache!

Normal

Well, life is slowly falling back to closer to normal again. It was so nice to get away and enjoy time with the family. The kids are now working hard at catching up with homework and that "stuff."

I am starting to feel a little better, too. It took a lot out of me being away and I have been so tired since being home. I'm sure that day by day it will improve. I am so happy that I stayed "ok" while we were gone, though. I wondered how it would go. The Lord answered many prayers in providing a nice, healthy time away.

I am still finding that when I overdo it a little my headache does become stronger so I am still trying to find that balance. Lately I think I have been a little lax on trying to exercise so I need to work on that more but again stay within the limits my body has. I sometimes think that my strength is like water in a glass. I am given so much "water" each day. When the glass runs out, I can't go back for a refill so I am done for the day. Each drop of water needs to be used effectively because the water (or energy) can run out pretty quickly if I squander it!

While we were gone we took my wheelchair. I ended up using it more than I would have liked. However, so many things were spread out and if I chose to walk one time, I might use most of my daily allotment of energy so Kyle really encouraged me to use the wheelchair. Sometimes I feel a little silly. I think people see me in it, but then see me walking around at our "destination" and wonder what I am up to. But despite my embarrassment of using the wheelchair, it does give me more freedom than I would have otherwise.

Back

We are back. Everything went well--for which we are so thankful! Now I just need some rest time to get on top of things again.