Tuesday, March 29, 2016

Time passing

It has been more than two years since I last wrote on this blog.  Sometimes I forget that it is here, yet it is never so very far from me.  Every time I have a significant headache, which is more frequent than I would prefer, I think about what has happened in the past.

Ten years ago this summer I started seriously seeking help for headaches that escalated beyond my wildest imagination. Pain so intense that I can't describe it. Doctor visits, hospital stays, surgery after surgery, infection and ongoing pain. If I had known ten years ago what the future would hold, what would I have done?  I've been asked what choices we would have changed in my treatment. I've seen some excellent doctors and a few that should not be allowed to continue working with clients. I've been understood with compassion and I've been mocked.

Today I am thankful that my headaches on a daily basis are not nearly as severe as they had been. I am thankful that I haven't been hospitalized for quite some time. I really wish that the headaches would go away all together! I wish that the major headaches would decrease even more in number. Yesterday was another tough day.  Not surprising since it was a busy week last week with our oldest home from college and a big day on Sunday celebrating Easter.  I wish that I could be the typical person that goes through a day without having to think about the amount of activity I've participated in for the day and the days before. Measuring whether I can get through the days ahead with what I've done in that day.

Life has taken a turn for the worse in our home.  With our youngest daughter, age 12, now in a mental health facility for Reactive Attachment Disorder, the challenges continue. Our life has been a study in unusual difficulties. I really wouldn't wish any of these hard things on another person but would like to be able to walk through a life with a little less hard times. We are so tired, weary and just not sure how to keep moving forward.  The Lord continues to carry us though, especially when we just want to throw in the towel and call it enough. Because we really have had enough. The Lord continues to lead us on, though, Please pray for our endurance and continued trust in Him.