The weeks continue to roll by it seems. This "warmer" weather is so nice, so a drop back to really cold tomorrow doesn't seem all that appealing.
Tara is sick today. Not so sick, but just enough of a temp that I didn't want to send her to school. Kyle and I took turns being home with her through the day and she seems to be perking up.
I have wondered if there is anyone else out there that has had some of the same experiences that I have had. It really bothers me that I am not regaining my strength. I would so like to know if this is just the way it will be so that I learn to accept it or if there is hope for the future. It is a little frustrating sometimes being the mystery.
An amazing thing has happened, though. An aunt in Washington on my mom's side sent me a book around Christmas time. It is primarily a book of encouragement, but the interesting thing is that there is information about the author of the book. She described her experiences with a rare disorder, and although she didn't name it I recognized that it probably is the Intracranial Hypertension! Amazing!!! I googled her name and found her location. I have emailed her, with her responding and asking me to call. I haven't made the connection yet, but it is exciting to find someone that has had some similar experiences. So we will see where that leads and if I can find any hints to try to improve my health.
Friday, January 28, 2011
Friday, January 21, 2011
Friday
I enjoy getting the tidbits of information that others have. Thanks for the advice regarding math practice!
This has been another week of ups and downs--my life story lately it seems! The weather has been fluctuating. I also way overdid it on Tuesday and have been struggling the rest of this week to catch up. As the day goes by, so do I. Thankfully I have been very blessed in that I can sleep every night. I am generally so tired that by the time I am in bed I drop to sleep very fast. That hasn't always been the case with the headaches, so I am definitely thankful for that!
I don't remember if I have written this before, but I have been a little overwhelmed with the sadness and heartache around me again. Two men that I knew at Dordt are struggling with cancer as well as a friend from the Netherlands. Another little girl has a brain tumor, and there has been emotionally difficult news to take and understand in our church at large. Another friend has been waiting for years to take home the children they have been trying to adopt. Sometimes it can be overwhelming to think about the sadness, hurt, pain and sense of loss that accompanies the news of hard times. I know that the Lord uses difficult times to refine us and draw us closer but it just isn't always so easy to understand the why's of these things. I love the verses in Isaiah 43 1) But now thus says the Lord, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. 2) When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned and the flame shall not consume you. 3) For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior. Then Isaiah 40: 31 Buty they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.
What an encouragement and blessing during hard times. I will continue to pray that the Lord comes quickly!
This has been another week of ups and downs--my life story lately it seems! The weather has been fluctuating. I also way overdid it on Tuesday and have been struggling the rest of this week to catch up. As the day goes by, so do I. Thankfully I have been very blessed in that I can sleep every night. I am generally so tired that by the time I am in bed I drop to sleep very fast. That hasn't always been the case with the headaches, so I am definitely thankful for that!
I don't remember if I have written this before, but I have been a little overwhelmed with the sadness and heartache around me again. Two men that I knew at Dordt are struggling with cancer as well as a friend from the Netherlands. Another little girl has a brain tumor, and there has been emotionally difficult news to take and understand in our church at large. Another friend has been waiting for years to take home the children they have been trying to adopt. Sometimes it can be overwhelming to think about the sadness, hurt, pain and sense of loss that accompanies the news of hard times. I know that the Lord uses difficult times to refine us and draw us closer but it just isn't always so easy to understand the why's of these things. I love the verses in Isaiah 43 1) But now thus says the Lord, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. 2) When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned and the flame shall not consume you. 3) For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior. Then Isaiah 40: 31 Buty they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.
What an encouragement and blessing during hard times. I will continue to pray that the Lord comes quickly!
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Saturday
Perhaps my strength has increased slightly? I'm not sure because I still feel so tired by afernoon and really need to have rest time before the evening. As I get more tired, my head seems to hurt more although i sometimes wonder if it may be the same but I just can't deal with it as well when I am more tired (or exhausted might be a better word). I really question whether I will regain that strength, but then I will have someone remind me that I did have numerous brain surgeries--it might just take more time.
Sometimes the last years seem a little surreal. Did it really happen? Was the pain as intense as I sometimes remember--but the answer to that questions doesn't take long to remember. :) I know the thought of another hospital stay fills me with dread--that is easy to remember as well.
I continue to be very careful with my head. I feel like it is as fragile as a thin egg shell. Bumping around much still hurts, I don't move my head fast (although better than before) and I am super careful about falling or really even having anyone touch my head. However, I keep thinking about summer coming (soon I hope!) and how badly I would like to ride bike. I'm not sure if my balance is all that much better but I really think I am going to try it. Maybe if I wear a bike helmet as a precaution and go slow just in case. We'll see. I miss so many things and this is a small thing but something we used to enjoy as a family that I would like to regain. I guess I have more time to contemplate it considering we have about a foot of snow on the ground right now.
Each day is so busy with all the kids' activities like homework, reading practice, math practice, etc. I have been wondering how Kyle ever kept up with it all when I was basically no help. He had to take care of me, run me all over and keep up with the stuff for the kids. I am so thankful for him and all that he has done to keep our family together and moving forward! All the pain, struggles and more pain are all worth it just now when Tara gives me a hug and tells me I am the greatest. Somedays I have wondered!
Sometimes the last years seem a little surreal. Did it really happen? Was the pain as intense as I sometimes remember--but the answer to that questions doesn't take long to remember. :) I know the thought of another hospital stay fills me with dread--that is easy to remember as well.
I continue to be very careful with my head. I feel like it is as fragile as a thin egg shell. Bumping around much still hurts, I don't move my head fast (although better than before) and I am super careful about falling or really even having anyone touch my head. However, I keep thinking about summer coming (soon I hope!) and how badly I would like to ride bike. I'm not sure if my balance is all that much better but I really think I am going to try it. Maybe if I wear a bike helmet as a precaution and go slow just in case. We'll see. I miss so many things and this is a small thing but something we used to enjoy as a family that I would like to regain. I guess I have more time to contemplate it considering we have about a foot of snow on the ground right now.
Each day is so busy with all the kids' activities like homework, reading practice, math practice, etc. I have been wondering how Kyle ever kept up with it all when I was basically no help. He had to take care of me, run me all over and keep up with the stuff for the kids. I am so thankful for him and all that he has done to keep our family together and moving forward! All the pain, struggles and more pain are all worth it just now when Tara gives me a hug and tells me I am the greatest. Somedays I have wondered!
Thursday, January 6, 2011
New Year here
We've celebrated the coming of the new year, and now here we are in January. I seem to find myself a little disappointed at this time of year. The holidays are done, it is cold and snowy and will be cold and snowy for a long time yet. There aren't any official holidays that allow us to close the office until Memorial Day! Just not my favorite time of the year. However, it is also a time of fresh beginnings. I am not a New Years resolution sort of person, but it is interesting to make plans and goals in our office and think about what the coming year may bring. It is a blessing to make plans that are positive instead of planning surgeries and wondering how to survive from one point to the next.
My hope and prayer is that I might be as healthy or even healthier than 2010. The last year was a remarkably good year in comparison to the previous few years. I never understood or recognized how important health is and how it impacts your life. I would love to become healthier, stronger and more fit, but I am so grateful for where I am today.
Our youngest, Tara, had an ear infection once again. I so hope that she can outgrow this, but they continue to be a problem for her. Otherwise, we have been healthy outside of the colds that are going around. We are thankful for this as well.
My hope and prayer is that I might be as healthy or even healthier than 2010. The last year was a remarkably good year in comparison to the previous few years. I never understood or recognized how important health is and how it impacts your life. I would love to become healthier, stronger and more fit, but I am so grateful for where I am today.
Our youngest, Tara, had an ear infection once again. I so hope that she can outgrow this, but they continue to be a problem for her. Otherwise, we have been healthy outside of the colds that are going around. We are thankful for this as well.
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