Wednesday

Tonight we attended the dedication of a new church building and were able to see many dear friends that I haven't seen for quite a while since we moved and no longer attend that church. It was beautiful and so neat to see God's blessing there.

Recently several people have told me that they feel that they can tell me now that time has passed since being in the hospital that when they visited me there they really didn't think I was going to live. That is a sobering thing to hear once, and even more to hear it several times from different people. But it is a good thing for me to hear. I so often forget how ill I was. That is ok, except that it also makes me so impatient and frustrated. The last couple weeks I have just been, in all honesty, discouraged and frustrated. Really no good reason. I should be happy and thankful, which I am, but still just need to get out of this slump. I am really weary of being sick. I have been sick for 3 1/2 years and just so much want to be well. I am better then I have been for a long time. The headaches are bothersome but not overwhelming or horrible. I can deal with them. I just can't seem to gain my strength. I am taking a week off of physical therapy just because I needed a break. It doesn't seem like I am seeing any progress and I decided I just am sick of dealing with all this. Probably not the best choice.

Now I am done whining. I need to move on and just be thankful that I am alive, parenting my kids, being a wife and making steps in the right direction. My continued study of the Psalms of Ascent have definitely been an encouragement to me--well timed.